Maybe you readin' this up in Milwaukee... or Detroit... or Minneapolis... or some lil' town out in the sticks. I can tell you about two things, though. I can tell you about the streets of Chicago and I can tell you about economic recession. I am a bluesman, you know. Maybe you been off the streets of yo town and you ain't seen the problem like I done seen it. Folks ain't got the money to spend like they used to. Used to go out and throw the shit away like it was toilet paper with inconsistent feces on it. Now if you a band, you might find it harder to get assholes to come out to your show, or if you work in the club, you might have noticed how hard it is to get assholes in there to drink booze and feed yo babies.
Maybe you been walkin' down the street and seen how them street folk been more aggressive about gettin' at your spare change, which ain't so spare these days.
If you live in a big city, you know yo local sidewalk "speedbums"... fools ain't got no job, whether cuz they decrepit or cuz they just a plain ol' bums. Ones I see all the time is in Chicago's "Crotch," in Wicker Park at Milwaukee, Damen and North. Same ol' fools been out there ever since I woke up out of a drinkin' binge in Chicago a few years back. Usually we tight and all is good, but when the money ain't circilatin' like it was befo', look out... them motherfuckers be askin' for too much money an' they get bold as hell. They'll walk right up to yo ass while you sittin' at the outdoor restaurant patio... while you sittin' in the window of one of them fancy saloons... or when you gettin' fresh with somebody in the alley. Shit, they don't care... they hungry (thirsty) and the fists is gettin' tight around the hood.
You gonna see utha muthafuckas comin' round the 'hood, too. Hell, that Crotch is gettin' whiter and whiter each day, and it ain't just the yuppie douchebags movin' into gentrified condos no more. The bums are gettin' whiter. The Crotch is littered with lazy white hippie drifters askin' for money, or playin' them little mini guitars that sound like a toy.
You might think it some kinda pain in yo ass that all these fuckers is askin' you fo mo money and cigarettes and shit, but you better enjoy it while it lasts, because the next step is that they gonna rob yo ass! I ain't floatin' no kind of shit on that, neither. YO WHITE ASS IS GONNA GET ROBBED. SO IS YO BLACK ASS. Every shade of yo ass is gonna get robbed, and if you never got robbed before, let me tell you what might accompany it... a beatdown, a quick-hit with a stick, a shivvin' and maybe a shot will ring out in the night. Desperation will make a man do crazy things... especially a man who ain't got no pride enough to work for his money.
Yo home is gonna get broked into. They gonna take anything they can find. Half the time they don't know how worthless shit is, but they seem to have a knack for knowin' what is full of worth to you alone. They'll take yo prize collection of grandma photos and throw 'em away in a dumpster outside a pawn shop. If they lucky, they'll take all yo shit that worth money, too. Hope you ain't home when they come in. Desperation will make a man do crazy things.
Wimmen drive me the craziest. That ain't no surprise to any man that's ever dealt with one, but they can be some stubborn folks. I'm all kinds of down with you doin' what you want to do in the office, the military, the bed... that don't make no difference to me, but a lot of you wimmen think you tough shit and ain't nobody can fuck with you. I got some questions fo you wimmen...
How big yo muscles, how much karate you know and how fast can you dig out that eye-killin' spray from yo big ol' purse???
You a target. Yo money look easier... but they come after anyone.
My recommendation for the time being? Be courteous and don't make no street enemies... don't look like you got money... don't get shit-hammered drunk and stumble 'round the streets... don't walk around alone... be mindful 'bout what goin' on behind you... and be ready to get yo' ass jumped. If possible, if confronted with a mugger, point him in the direction of a much easier target... say a whitey couple with a baby... or a hipster who pants too tight to run in. Self-preservation, man.
Milwaukee... Chicago... Detroit... Minneapolis... Peoria... keep yo eyes open.
Desperation will make a man do crazy things.
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